There was once a girl who took a taxi with a ‘P’ plate instead of a ‘H’ plate. (The ‘H’ plate taxis are the legit ones in T&T.) The driver took her to a deserted area and wanted to rape her. He also had a gun so he told her to obey all his commands, if not he would shoot her. She listened to him and stripped off all her clothes. But just when he was about to rape her, she said
“Please put on a condom. I have HIV.”
The man pulled up his pants immediately and drove her back home.
This story was told to us by Corlson, a native here in Tobago. He was the first taxi driver we met upon reaching the Scarborough Ferry Terminal, and we’ve stuck with him since. Here are a few more precious tidbits he has shared with us that have helped enlighten our understanding about Tobago:
SICK with Corlson at the Blue Waters Inn jetty
On asking him about whether there was a minimum age for alcohol consumption:
Ya, it’s 18. But this is a third world country, yuh can do anything you want.
On the Trinbago perception of Chinese people:
When I was young, I thought every Chinese person I met knew kungfu! Cos every Chinese movie I watched had kungfu in it! … Do yuh know kungfu?
On why the only hospital on the island is built at the highest point of Tobago:
They are thinking with their feet and not their head!
(But it was really because it used to be a military hospital, presumably for the casualties who got injured fighting at Fort King George. Still, doesn’t quite explain why it’s still there..)
On why everyone we’ve met in T&T so far has been trying to exchange TT dollars for USD:
TT currency is completely useless outside of Trinidad & Tobago, everyone wants USD. Yuh only keep yuh TT if you want a souvenir. But yuh can use USD anywhere in the world! Almost everyone has a US account, everyone else is interested in getting one.
When we started fumbling in the car because there was a spider:
Yuh in paradise, the animals are friendly! Yuh see a spider, yuh put it in yuh clothes and yuh go to sleep! Yuh see a snake, yuh put it in your pocket!
Funnily enough, when Scratchy, our dog at Bayview Villa, bounded up to him on the morning we left, he asked us worriedly if it was dangerous. Maybe it was because Scratchy was being more of a Smelly and Barky instead.